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So what if twentyfifth-o1 was the sweetest day.

So what if my day was brighten up by that.

So what if I was trembling at that moment.

So what if I was afraid.

So what if I was so happy.

So what if I was crying.

So what if I'm missing it badly.

So what if My mind is full of that.

So what if I wasn't feeling good inside.

So what if I'm getting worst day by day.

So what if i'm down here typing out so many so what if.

Just feeling so random, so pain, so uncomfortable.

Well. Seriously,i missed it all.

;and tonight wasn't a beautiful night.

Sitting in the bus, staring into the space and there it goes,

all the recaps.

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Shopping at orchard today, with classmates.Had lunch at cine and pepperlunch for dinner. Was back home after dinner which is around 10plus. A really fun day where jiaying got so crazy after eating pepper lunch. Camwhored alil at pepperlunch too. Anyway,I've spent alot for newyear. Now, i'm broke,so broke.

lols.

Yesterday was a dream or rather a night mare. Afterall, still the sweetest dream ever. I like it, but was afraid of it too. It's scary but yet wonderful. I brought in uncountable pains but it include warmth in there. And well, that scene, that look, i will always remember.

Lastly, i really love it.

Gottta go now.

GOODBYE!

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The only ability to break it.

And i could feel it once again, now.

好痛。

i'm sorry,sigh.

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Happy 18th Birthday JevonneHuang (:

Suddenly, have the urge to stop blogging immediately.

No idea why.

Sigh, i don't feel like saying anything here today. Not even a single bit of what i'm thinking now. Lets just kept it inside my heart and stay there forever.

GOODBYE NOW

i'msorrytobemissingyouagain.
;and i dont want to cry tonight.

it's another 23rd tomorrow,happybirthdaylsyt

Ps: iloveyou

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I've deleted what i written earlier on, for a lot of times. I wrote and i deleted all. I dont know what i'm typing, dont know what i wanted to say and i dont know what should i blog about. Seeing you guys like this, i felt very uncomfortable. All of you are my close friends and i hate to see all of you behaving this way. I believe, you guys hate to type in that way but the fact have forced you all into this.


If there is a choice, nobody would wants to grow up.


You may think that, i'm just being silly to think that way. Or rather, i was running away from facts. But i wasn't. I'm just trying my best to not thinking about those ugly memories. I always led myself to those beautiful memories whereby everything perfect is with me. Well, i understand that being like this was totally wrong. But i just doesn't want to get my face wet with all those tears. I've told myself, enough of tears. Though it doesn't work all the time, but at least i know i've tried.


The past always kept people missing. For everything that i'm seeing everyday, i would be seeing a shadow of you.

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For the previous 2 posts. Don't bother to try understand what i was saying if you don't get it. It's okay (: Nothing important to know either, but it isn't chim at all lah. hahahhaas. I'm just blogging normally like what i'm doing. Hahs.

Well, met up with jianwen,ahben, 亲爱的 and kaisiong. And we took bus to xuehong's school together. Walked around there and had our lunch there before we headed to orchard. Walked around orchard till late night, around 8plus and we took bus back to chup lao. Had dinner at hawker and was crapping away. Left hawker only at 11plus and it's a waste that yang wasn't with us and he's so busy with his school work la. Anyway, had a great time with them today. Didn't took alot of pictures. So, just 3 of them to post up.

I could sense your presence. It's as though you're just right here. I saw so many of them, in fact someone whom will sure with you, were here. But, not you. Maybe this is all faded and planned. I looked around quite alot of times, but i just don't see you, not even your shadow. I guess, you knew i was there and you just wanted to avoid - maybe?
Well, it's like so near yet so far. Sigh

GOODBYE!

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Felt alot better after hanging up. But still, it's feeling painful inside regarding both matters. It has been said that no one can be trusted in this world. Still, i believes in myself that i wouldnt be wrong for at least once. I trusted all my closest friends. I know, they're the ones who are trustable and will always be. The past isn't a regret. It's just a pity that everything have to come to an end. You've once made my days and i truly hope it will always remains.

Well, it would never will now.

I need to adapt changes and not dwelling over those changes. I'd not become any stronger, i'm still as weak as before. Everybody is changing, am i changing too?

Guess i'm not.

I hate those pains.

Everyday, it's bringing in more.

Sigh. I miss you, so much.

9aug2007, i will never forget that day.

I know you wouldn't be able to recall anything about that day, but it's okay.

You're leading your life happily with her by your side. Everything doesn't matter now. I'm not longer special, in fact so normal now.

Anyway, you'll never be forgotten.

ilu,likehowiusedtobe.Andit'slikehowdeeplyyou'refallingforher

Yang, thanks so much.

Thank you, really.

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Well, the whole of this week was really stressed up. It has not been a easy one and in fact, i think 2008 is gonna be another tough year. Instead of being better than 2007, which i think it's really impossible now. Not gonna dream about all those wishes or even something better.

Anyway, it's not that only you can affect me. Everything relates have the ability to destory the inside me. Everyone is born fragile. It's always the hurt and happenings around led to oneself becoming stronger. But that doesnt apply to all, some may just stay as what they are. It's just how you see things and handling them.

Sometimes, i just want to know why. Also, having the urge to but wouldn't dare. Always backing off with those actions. As i looked at things around, most of the time i saw something really similar, but i know it's just some sort of replacement. They're totally different which couldn't be compared together. But everytime i saw, it reminds. I really hate this.

School have been really bad for the whole week. Getting busier each day. Rushed to school, rushed to work and studying. Exams are all coming up, but it's ending soon. Till the mid march, it will be the exams week again. Have been studying like a nerd, which you can hardly see me doing that. Tomorrow will be the last one, Bfs ca1. The retest, i will definitely flunk it. I've no idea what is it all about. Furthermore, nothing will gets in whenever i try studying. Also, making me feel really irritated by just looking at it. Tsk.

thanks to that kindsoul who accompanied me.

Finally, i realised that you're quite kind.

Well,it's breaking from millions to billions.

仿佛就像看到了你的影子。

忽然好想好想你。

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What if one day you woke up and realised everything was all lies that someone dearly to you created it. How would you feel? I believe, not everyone could be able to understand that feeling very clearly. Well, 三个人之中一定只有一个伤的最痛。Anyway, seeing people around being so unhappy, i dont feel good too. Friends, do cheer up!

Sometimes i hope i know nothing or even saw her. But this is life, god wouldn't let you living in the world peacefully. You've got to go through a lot, in order to live on. Falling, is what everybody would have a chance to experience it. And the period of suffering the pain from the fall was even longer than enjoying the sweetness in those happy moments. 幸福，往往都是短暂的。

Working has became the best way to remove everything from my mind for that 2-3hours. But working like this everyday is gonna make me faint soon. Butsometimes,itsjusttoodifficulttofallasleepwheneverythingkeptflashingback.

everything is written here, you will never sees it. Well, you won't of cause. All along, my blog has been something lame to you. You always told me in the past that blog is something very lame.

Alright. Was out today, to complete my presentation. Thank god that i manage to complete it on time. Or else, i will flunk it on tuesday. Tired now, nothing more to blog. Arh, my blog is getting more and more boring. Tsk.

TATA!

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Primary School Gathering 2008

Okay, it's very sad that all couldn't make it last minute. Therefore, it's only left with the four of us. Hopefully, benoni isn't feeling boring throughout the day. Hahahs. Well, suppose to be meeting at 2pm over at bus stop near home. But i was late and we met each other later. Elin's friends drove us to Plaza sing and met benoni over there. Yah, went straight for lunch when we met. Had longjohn and we went walking around. Decided to watch movie and we watched BoogeyMan2. Oh damn, it's an M18 show which has lots of disgusting scenes. Sound effects were pretty scary too. I think, we made alot of noise while others were watching quietly.

The movie had a very oh-so-what-the-hell ending. Many scenes were really got so disgusted that emily and i nearly puke. Freaking gross, you know. Elin felt the same lah but dont understand why benoni felt nothing -.-

Anyway, after the movie we went to find yang at his workplace. Then, walked over to cine to have dinnner. Took neoprints after dinner and headed homeee with elin.

Pictures below are all taken today! (:

That's all.
GOODBYE!

Oh, before i go. i don't like people to tag with unknown or without names.
So please! tag with names please.

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Nothing special in school today, lessons are boring as usual. Doing nothing else but letters. Seeing redo again and again. As for Iac, it's all about disposal, disposal and still disposal. Met sufen and yetpheng after school and went over to tampines for lunch. Had longjohn and bus-ed back to sufen's place for dessert. Stayed for awhile and headed home before going for work. After working, had dinner at hawker with brother and sisterinlaw.

I'm feeling really tired.

you know, i nearly cry today.

Well, i hold back. Thankgod. Or else, i will be looking ugly when i enter classroom.

寒山寺上一颗竹，您若无心各自飞，此言非虚能兑现，只要友情雨下显，天鹅一出鸟不见

suppose to be 《请猜五个字》, but i'm not gonna write out the answer. Provided that you have the right answer. Don't try asking me too, i just don't want to let you know.

So, dont bother thinking what is it all about

xD

Off to bed now.

Lights off, good night everyone!

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Bad cramps ):

It's some shit day today. I had a class for 3hours and another class for 2hours. But, i only when to school for 2hours. Which is break and a hour of IAC, damn lame. Should have stay at home and sleep. Anyway, i was late for Iac and skipped Bfs. Oh, i felt guilty now :(

Well, had lunch at century square before heading to kelvin's place. Together with jianbin, andy, jiaying and jianing. Had mahjong session for awhile and left together with jianbin at evening. Met jiejie and went to work together. Felt so damn tired with that cramps on me, furthermore had an hour of overtime today. Made me reached home so late. Tsk.

Alrighttyyyeee.

Nothing more to blog now. Just realised i'd Iac homework to do lah.That's another shit. All this shit is gonnna stink my blog, tsk.

GoodBye now!

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Wednesday is always a very good day.

But today, the day don't begin very well like the other wednesday. I've a really bad mood this morning and i couldn't figure out why this would happened on me again. I think i'm so different when i'm in school, compared to when i'm alone. Oh wells.

Anyway, met up 宝贝 in school and we cabbed back to my house. Got changed and cabbed to cathy to meet xuehong and 亲爱的。We'd dinner together over at cathy before meeting ahben and jianwen. Had a great time buffet'ing at 日本村，laughed and talked alot. Hahas, and we're getting so crazily in love with that big plate of salmon. It taste so heavenly nice. You guys should try dining at 日本村,it's a nice place. With pretty decorations, variety of sushi and reasonable price for student like us! (:

After dining, we took bus to cine and we went to play pool, after buying tickets, while waiting for ahben and jianwen to reach. We'd the movie on 745, actually we're planning to watch One Miss Call (which i'm so scared of watching but yet i find it interesting and wanted to watch) But because we won't be able to catch that movie on time, so we changed plan. We watched Mission Sex Control instead. Quite funny but a lil'boring. Hahs. After movie, ahben and jianwen had their dinner and we all went home together.

Too bad that yang have got his project to complete therefore he can't join us for buffet and movie. I know he will be very pleased to be joining us, but he've got his stuff to do lah. Anyway yang, don't stress alright. Rest more after everything end! Andandand!, xuehong cheer up too. Smile more and don't get stressed suddenly. But, glad to know that you're fine now :D

Anyway, andy signed up a member card which is quite useful for him. And so nice of him to lend it to me because he knows i'm going movie at cathy. So, tickets were given discount. I swear, i didn't ask him for it lah. Well, thankyou andy (:

To end my post with pictures taken today. Not alot of them because they don't usually camwhore with us. They only camwhore among themselves,their own brothers. lol

Enjoy those few pictures. You're get hungry seeing the first picture, i guess.

Don't they looks tasty to you? We ate even more than this lah!

And we finished everything okay!

亲爱的，宝贝，顺甄，学宏。

Oh, see how adorable she was. hahas

GOODBYE! and GOODNIGHT!
don'tstopmefrommissingandlovingalthoughitbringsinpain.
i'msorrybutiloveyou,boy.

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It has been a few months since we last talked to each other. Today, we talked alot. Due to some misunderstanding, we're kinda stopped contacting. But still, we're very good friends. And i felt really happy to have you as one of my good friend. Anyway, if it's not him, i bet we won't be talking to each other today. Or rather, that one month we wouldn't have become such good friends already. Well, thank my favourite (:

If you realised, when you gain something, you will be losing something at the same time. Believe this? I experienced this, i guess. Now, i believe. I've gained lkkp and lost lsyt.

Alright, school have started for 2days and i still think holidays are the best. To be frank and true, during holidays, there isn't a bit of time for me to think about all happenings in 2007 because i'm too busy with outings, works and meet ups. Well, now it's different. Whenever i'm in the bus, on my way to school, there are so much time to think la? No distractions to wake me up from there.

i miss.

Nice song.

我可以忍受你不够爱我

我可以忍受你遥远的梦

就算是变化挖空我

至少你还在乎我的感受

我可以忍受眼神的空洞

我可以忍受你时间不够用

却不能忍受做了那么多

使她拥有我该得到的温柔

(使她拥有我没看过的笑容)

爱着你

是我改不了也不愿改的习惯

要放开哪有那么简单

了解你

是我说不出也不承认的悲哀

包容你

是我体谅的爱也当作应该

不要说对不起

原来你要的不是我

不要说谢谢你

什么你永远在我心中

can u tell me why

这样的我-你也曾爱过

不是么……

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First day of school reopen

Met the new IAC lecturer, Ms Heng.

She made me felt that i'm still in secondary school.

Do you get what i'm trying to say?

If you don't, nevermind.

Well, had an early release for IAC.

And yah, she said for just once and no more next time.

Oh, i just hate such sentence.

Imagine, we had 2 days of 3hours of Iac.

It's another nightmare now ):

Anyway, reading through many blogs, i saw people writing about their life in year2007

Quite a interesting topic too. Furthermore, when you think backwards, many many memories will be flashing back and it could even make you teared or smile sweetly. I've been always thinking about it, but whenever i thought of those happy moments with that sweet smile i'd on my face. Bad and sad memories would just happened to pass by and make my smile gone missing. In additon, tears would have just roll down naturally. And this lead me to be hating year2007.

Oh wells, that's the past now.

I wonder why, after so long, when the surrounding is changing, people is changing and in fact everything is changing. But why,why isn't that something else changing, just like the others.

Living in a whole like this, ain't easy.

Arh, lesson at 8am tomorrow!

GOOD BYE!

no title.

Another two group photos taken on jianbin's birthday

Clearer one.
The blurred one. I think this looks really cool.
But don't you think we look too formal already?

Ended work at 1230, went home straight and have been slacking at home from just now till now. Damn boring. Most of the people is working today and i'm home staring at this com.
Luckily twinnie is home to chat with me in msn.
Well, my precious computer is having some attitude recently.
Hope it won't die off out of a sudden, please.
Be good alright.
:D


School reopens tomorrow!
Arh, tomorrow! ):
I didn't do any of my homeworks and never touch on my presentation.
I'm dead lah, but i dont want to fail or do badly.
Well, no point saying so much here.
My lazineess is beyond help. lol
I've enjoyed too much and i want to continue enjoying la.
)))):


Alright, i dont want to anymore!
Gotta watch tv already!
TATA TATA TATA!

no title.

Happy Birthday Huang JianBin!

it's belated now =X

He's the first the turn 19 in Qb.

Arh, hope my birthday will come soon too lah.

But, xuehong and ahben won't be around at that time ):

So sad lah. 2 of my best friends isn't around.

Well, went to jianbin's bbq yesterday.

We reached there around 7plus and i just stayed for less than 2hours.

And worst thing was, i forgot to bring his present lah.

So sorry leh.

Nothing much to blog what i did there.

We just eat, chat and took pictures.

But i hasn't got any of the picture yet.

Post it up when i got them alright.

Yang came to fetch me around 9plus.

Meet the others and again, didn't sleep for the night.

I just slept 2hours before going work.

Now, i'm feeling really tired.

2moredays to the end of the holiday.

And i realised, i have not done my presentation.

Arh, i hope school start so soon?

): I don't want to go back to schoooool.

you make me feel that you're avoiding.

Sigh.

Gotta take a nap now.

May come back again.

GOODBYE!

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Overdued pictures!

Pictures are not in order. Enjoy (:

Forgotten the date.

Sulis's wedding day.

19december2007

Brother'sweddingday

15december2007

Brother's POP

Sister and brother.

婆婆 and brother.

Me and my brother (:

4January2008

Jianbin's Birthday

Me, darling, jiaying

Jiaying, me.

Me, darling.

Darling, BirthdayBoy and me!

Jiaying, darling, guangye, jianbin and me.

Kelvin, andy, kaixiang, guangye.

no title

What a day!

I realised my day always started of beautiful but ended up ruined.

Wa lau, why issit like this?

I really dislike that kinda feeling.

Where you actually feeling so happy but yet something make you felt so sad randomly.

Arh ):

Anyway anyway, i met up with darling and guangye today! (:

We meet at PS and they accompanied me for lunch.

Then we walked around Ps awhile and we spotted a empty space.

It's a corridor actually. Arh, i dont know how to explain that place?

But well, we went in and we start camwhore session.

Hahas, we took around 77 pictures. 5 were deleted.

And Its left with 72. Didnt post all up - too many already.

Hopefully the first picture you see, don't scare you away.

Hmmmm, actually window shopped is what we did today lah.

But still darling bought a top and i bought a dress (:

That's all i think.

Don't wish to talk about the unhappy post.

But still, i'm so sorry.

):

you used to be there listening to my complains.But, not now anymore

Alright! Pictures time!

Funniest picture of the day -.-

Guangye stole my shoe!

Look at his tee, what animal do you see?

Giraffe is taller ^^

Bob, the builder!

Doggiie!

Darlings!

Prettiest Mama, our wonder woman!

Guangye says, he is the superman!

Me, guangye

Guangye, darling.

Our craziness, brighten up each other's day.

TheEnd.
TATA!
missesfrommetoyou.
GOODNIGHT.

no title.

Congratulations to Jay&Jewel (:

It's the 3rd wedding dinner i've attended in less than 3months.

lols, everyone is getting married.

THE GIFT.

Adorable, isnt it?

(:

Well, worked this afternoon and went home straight to prepare.

Met Zhiwei at 7 and he was late. Damn guy.

Anyway, he drove me to go together.

Nothing much though. This wedding of theirs was unique.

Quite different from some others which i've saw.

And of cause, the bride was pretty (:

Okay, i know i'm always posting pictures of myself more.
Please don't get sick of me, lol.
But if you're, then you can always choose not coming in here (:

Hmmmmm.
Actually, i've a lot of overdue pictures.
But i've no time to post all at once, it's really too much.
Nevermind, i shall post it all when i freeee

Anyway, it's getting late now.
Gotta turn in soon, or else i won't able to wake up on time for my meet up tomorrow!

TATA!
Goodnight to youme! (:

edited.

hewasthenumber-dont-know-whatasking.
Otherthanansweringtillasifiwasfeelingnothing,whatelsecanidoorreactiknowitanewyear
andishouldntbelookingbackwards.butyougottoknow,i'veneveroncethoughtoflettinggoyou.
forthepastoneyear,ialwaysbelievethatallthatyou'vesaidwaswhaticantotallytrust.
andi'dneverthoughtofyoubreakingallthosetrustalsoneverthoughtofallyouractswerelies
ialwaysbelievewhatisawandialsobelievewhatyousayuntilnow.ofcauseibelieveyourloveforheris
enoughtocoverupalltheloveyouhadforme.Withhereyesstaringatmethatdaymakesmefelttotally
loseout.idontcomparebecauseiknowimnotgonnawin.yourhearthavesticktoherssotightly
thepastcanjustbekeptasmemories.Foryoucomingback,itsjustawish.Awishwhichwillnevercometrue.
ifeltreallypainfulinside.itsnotthatidontwantto,ireallycant

no title

Get high, get happy, get crazy.

And well, i skipped him.

I really got no more courage and confidence to.